originally published April 18, 2009
Laura quotes from the bible, "Before thou remove the speck from thy neighbour's eye, be sure to remove the pile of crap from thine own eye first."
Laura added the "How to invite friends and/or family to an event in the socially accepted fashion, i.e., actually inviting them" application.
Laura joined the group, "It's such a relief to find the source of a stench and eliminate it."
Laura: seeing faces where there are none.
Laura: seeing feces where there are none.
Laura added the "rag-tag buncha popes saint-appointing" application.
Laura greets the morning. Let the joy be unconfined.
Laura is performing a science experiment. Much like Diet Coke and Mentos, but with anger and her brain instead. Good thing she's doing this out in the backyard.
Laura says to herself, "Move away from the self-help section. At least until Chapters starts providing shopping carts."
Laura is thrilled her son can kill so many Nazi Zombies.
Laura took the "Which actor turned musician turned lunatic are you?" quiz.
Laura took the "What the patterns on your skull where you ripped out handfuls of hair reveal about your ideal job" quiz.
Laura added the "romantic symbolism of noxious weeds" application.
Laura lamentz the lost art've speling.
Laura is seeking the elusive mountain shrimp.
Laura joined the group "Remove Stephen Harper's fake face and fake cheques from Fake...erp, Facebook."
Laura added "5 things I forgot that I wish I could remember."
Laura added "5 people I wish I never had to speak to again."
Laura added the "Pick Your 5 Anonymous" application. The first step is admitting you have a problem.
Laura added the "I do not need to be notified every time someone uses an application" application.
Laura added the "That's gonna leave a mark" application.
Laura has the jimmy legs and will surely cause an incident.
Laura feels sick every time she accidentally stumbles upon a page containing Stephen Harper's smarmy punchable face.
Laura states that your insufferable optimism clashes with her tasteful nihilism.
Laura removed the "Platitudes such as 'smile,' 'relax,' and 'lighten up,' masquerading as helpful advice" application.
Laura is worshipping at the altar of the Dark Virgin of the Black Bean Burrito.
Laura is not a fan of people who use other people.
Laura became a fan of people who use deodorant.
Laura became a fan of people who use their indoor voice. GOT IT?!?
Laura advises caution. The dumb and the stupid are playing a dangerous game of chicken. Beware and be careful out there.
Laura became a fan of the healing power of hatred.
Laura is allergic to her own skin. And to magic.
Laura woke up with the Funky Cold Medina earworm.
Laura took the survey, "When a number you're dialing repeatedly isn't answered do you try it over & over & over again and then finally, after hours of trying, send a frantic panicked email asking the callee where they are or do you sensibly re-check the number, realize you've dialed it wrong, and then dial it correctly thus proving you're actually qualified to work in an office?"
Laura should be shocked and amazed that being killed due to police brutality is now called "in-custody death syndrome." But she's not.
Laura joined the group "doG's in his kennel and all's right with the world."
Laura has finally given in and adopted a slack-jawed, glassy-eyed, tilted-head, drooling response to things she doesn't understand.
Laura added the "I'll be Bach" classical terminator application.
Laura became a fan of edible oil products.
